A Gendered Tradition

This past October my oldest sister, Christina, got married. It was a beautiful fall wedding that will forever be one of the happiest moments of my life. But before that came all planning and discussions with a countless amount of people that would make that magical day a reality. One of the discussions I remember was one Christina had with me, Irene (my other sister), and Nate (her fiancé at the time) about her bridal party. Irene and I already knew that we had secured spots since we were the best sisters of all time, and Christina had decided that her high school friends, Jeanie and Jackie, were also be to apart of the party, so I didn't really know who else she could be pondering, but in this discussion she told us how she wanted her friend Akash to be a bridesman. We all thought it was a great idea, but for a brief moment she mentioned how it might be a bit unsettling to the older members of both families; them being more traditional. She had him in the party anyways because in the end it was really about who would be there for her. But this got me thinking as to why the bride and groom's party are so gendered?

While these parties aren't really a space, I feel that it's one of the most overlooked gendered traditions. The origin of these parties was from Rome. The law required that there should be 10 witnesses for each party. Eventually this law led to the peculiar tradition where bridesmaids and groomsmen would have to dress like the bride or groom to keep evil spirits away. Now if you believe in evil spirits, then by all means use your party to scare them away--but for me personally--I don't think there's anything or anyone to scare away other than Kim Davis.

I never really thought much of Christina having a guy in her party, but my parents were so shocked and exploded with questions: Why? What will he wear? How will he walk down the aisle? Are you sure? What will he do? Is he going to wear a dress? So you're telling me he's not in Nate's party?
This tradition has become so gendered that some have lost sight about what is truly important in a wedding: the two people getting married. I don't want to give off the impression that my parents were against it, they were just confused. I don't blame them. Society has made that tradition seem as if women only have woman friends that care that much or that men only have man friends that care that much when in reality, anyone can care for and love a person regardless of any other label that society has given them.

Have you seen a happier bunch of people?

Side note: This didn't happen at my sister's wedding but why do the girls always have to take the guy's arm when they walk down. Geez. I can walk by myself.